Day 20

Well, I officially am at the 3 week mark,  I am feeling like I need to change the name of my blog to rest of life???
Funny how this has become so much more than just quitting smoking and more about examining all the addictions and areas GOD wants to fix in my life.
Yes, yesterday sucked and it was a big transition for me.  I finally identified that I was hiding. The biggest thing I was hiding is the fear of trusting anyone with knowing the real me.  I have compartmentalized my whole life!  Hence, the half life......what is the rest of my life going to look like?  I don't know, and frankly don't want to. That paralyzes me and puts all the control back into my hands and I am done!!!  It is so scary and exciting as I venture deeper into who GOD has intended me to be.
Giving up the past....the past is also an addiction for me.  As long as I had the scared and lonely little girl, I could keep the mask on and I could still be the victim.  I didn't even know that I needed to hold on to her in order for me to feel safe.  God is showing me everyday that HE is holding that little girl and I can trust HIM!  I feel a shift in the balance of my life...yesterday was all about being in the tornado.  Today, there is grace abounding!  Check out what my reading was today!  2Cor 12: 8-10 says:
⁸ Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. ⁹ But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. ¹⁰ That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 
And all I can say is Glory to GOD in the Highest....I bow before the Creator.


So..day 20, crawled on my hands and knees to finally stand, had such amazing conversations, looked at the light of DAY.......rest of life???? Being a great believer!!

Love and peace, grace that fills your every cell and sinew...HE loves you more that you will ever imagine!  May your day 1 be glory unto HIM.  I am so proud that you are stepping out in faith.
Lovingly,
Jules