Day 17

Today has been a day of ......ambiguity.  Which the dictionary definition is:  1-doubtfulness or uncertainty of meaning or intention: to speak with ambiguity; an ambiguity of manner.'  Had several things I needed to do today and the mere fact I was "ambiguous in my manner" caused me some stress.  Best thing I learned today was "I am Gods masterpiece." Eph 2:10.   This is actually in the bible!  It made me realize that I was taking this process out of HIS hands !once again!, and putting it all on me.  I have become the perfect quitter!  No one else can quit smoking as good as me.  The glory of GOD was not going to be shown in this...it was the glory of Jules.  So needless to say, my body !once again! shut down.  My mind joined in too and "clickity clack" came back!  It took most of the day to ponder this new thought and while I was at yoga tonight, I acknowledged this.  The cankles started to go away, and so did "clickety"....I thank The ALMIGHTY ONE who cares about every little thing about me!  It is a wonder and a miracle every day.  I love that HE is not letting me get too far into my crazy...ness!!!before putting me back in my place.  HE loves us so. 
I am excited again about this process and am so ready to delve deeper into the psyche that comes with this.    It is a journey to discover who you are again without this addiction.  Sometimes it seems like "here we go again, another wardrobe change!" when actually it is GOD's way of molding and shaping us.  Being a willing vessel is the hardest part.  I LOVE who I am.....the quirkiness, the fact I wake up every day in a good mood, my ability to love, everything!  I didn't really think I needed to change, but obviously GOD has other purposes and plans.  I really believe that I was getting ready to rob myself of the beautiful plan that God has in this.  HE LOVES US SO!


so day 17....cleaned living room, had bible study, ate decent food, went to yoga, praising the KING!!!....rest of life?? lifted out of the pit!


May the Creator of the Universe be with you all tonight.  I pray for you and believe that you will be blessed beyond measure, and hoping you see HIS glory in everything around you!
Lovingly yours,
Jules