day 26

Today was a day of disappointments.....I wanted to smoke all day.  Still do as I am typing.  I am glad that I am having days like this because I know they are for the greater good of getting over this addiction.  Let me repeat that 25 times...50 times....278 times...maybe I should write it 5000 times on the blackboard!  GOD never said this was going to be easy.  I have been pretty lucky that I haven't had huge withdrawal symptoms that put you over the edge!  Dr. Bond told me today that I need to make sure I am eating good food, drinking lots of water, exercising, and getting plenty of rest.  This will keep those urges away because I have already quit!  He is so right and so lets take a look at what I have done in all those areas: 
Eating good food:  yesterday I had a JR Whopper and a bowl of Grapenuts, today I had a KFC wrap, and a bowl of Grapenuts, so nope...not eating good food.  (Really need to get to grocery store!)
Drinking lots of water:  I am drinking water, not lots but some
Exercising:  1 bikram yoga class in 2 weeks and haven't been to Curves in 2 weeks, so nope.....not exercising!
Get lots of rest:  4-6 hrs a night and 1 nap this past week, so nope.....not getting the proper amount of rest either!
So maybe the disappointment is all about me.  I was looking forward to some things that just didn't happen and I took it personally as usual and BAM! Back to self pity mode.....am I trying to sabotage this journey?  Am I sabotaging or just getting bored with this and my ADD is kicking in?  I think in my past I am always so quick to move on to something bigger and better.  My sister in law calls them shiny bubbles.  When you see them you just need to go chase them!  Life is always going to give you disappointing moments, I know this!  When will I learn to just give it ALL over to HIM?  I just went to Biblegateway.com to copy my reading for today, when look what the reading for the day is on this website??????
“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go.”” - Joshua 1:9
So obviously, this is my scripture for the day!!  Okay,  LORD GOD, MIGHTY ONE OF MY LIFE!!  I get it.  I will not be afraid, for I know that YOU are with me.  Isaiah 40:30-31 says 
³⁰ Even youths grow tired and weary,
   and young men stumble and fall;
³¹ but those who hope in the LORD
   will renew their strength.
They will soar on wings like eagles;
   they will run and not grow weary,
   they will walk and not be faint.
I understand this so much more that I ever have today!  HE is never going to let me go...I get it again today.

so day 26,.....did an extremely hard wallpaper job and got stressed, didn't get the wrap I wanted for lunch and got stressed, got a sad phone call and got stressed.......rest of life???? getting it slowly but surely!

We all get weary, but the KING of ALL CREATION is calling you to HIM.  Have hope that HE is there helping you with the rest of your life....and today is the first day!  I love you all, peace and stillness is being prayed over you tonight.

Jules